BIG BLACK HOLE!

I don't even know where to start today! I feel like I have either fallen or jumped to the very bottom of a big black hole!
I need a job in the worst way! And I can't seem to find one, no matter what I do! I have called and e-mailed all of my contacts and former coworkers...NOTHING! I'm going CRAZY being at home alone all day! I have nothing to do, I mean there is only so much laundry I can do!
For the past three days I have sat in my living room watching TV in my pajamas until just before Mr. K is going to be home, then I hop up and take a shower and get dressed!
I just can't get out of this hole!
August is getting here faster than I want. I'm not ready for it to be here yet! But I can't stop it!
I had to sign Mr. K and I up for insurance during his companies summer enrolment yesterday and because I have never been on his insurance before I had to fill out an EOI form! It was HORRIBLE! They wanted detailed information of everything medically that has occurred in the past 24 months! EVERYTHING! And because my brain is not working all that well these days I had to pull my medical records (Yes, I have me own copy of all my medical records!) and look a few things up, which made me realize that yesterday last year was the day we found out the girls were girls! Which made filling out that stupid form all that much worse!
And with August getting here I keep realizing how much not having a job hurts me! Last October before I went back to work, Mr. K and I sat down and worked out a plan. A plan that I never figured we would stick too, because I knew neither of us could wait. Last year we decided that we would wait until our anniversary to start trying, but then when I got back to work we changed our minds! I was right, we couldn't wait! But then I lost my job...so we were back to August, and how we ever thought that was a good idea...I don't know! But now we can't try...I don't have a job!
All I want to do is sit here on the sofa and maybe eat some ice cream! But I can't! That's not going to get me a job! That's not going to get me threw The Girls Birthday! And it is sure not going to get me out of this stupid hole!

I want my old life back!