Oh How I love my Job...

It has been so long since I have said that, but it is true! The thing with jobs is you have to like love the people that you work with! And I do! They are a wonderful bunch, I really only have good things to say about them. The funny part is the woman I am closest too, TheBoss (who is not the boss, but that is what I will be calling her), is married to one of my teachers from High School! And let me just tell you it is very funny to hear her talk about him at home or complain about something that he did...or heaven forbid talk about their sex life! I almost want to laugh from embarrassment some times, I don't know why but I do! She is just one of those genuinely nice, wouldn't hurt a fly, down to earth, southern, christian women! And I love her! She actually worked at my High School when my brother was there and knows him and says every day she can't believe she never knew how awesome I was! (see I'm telling you nice!)

Most of the people that I work closely with know about TheGirls, some I have told and others know because they know someone who knows me out side of school and all of them have been nothing but nice and compassionate about it, which was an unbelievable relief. I didn't know it would feel so good for people to not look at me like I was crazy all of the time or treat my like I was sick or something. I truly feel blessed to work with such an amazing bunch.

There are several things about this new job that I love that I did not know were possible. The first is, when you have a crazy stressful day and come time to go home you set it all down and walk away! Who knew that happened! I, sure didn't! Yes, I can bring work home with me but I don't need to and they would probably tell me not to worry about it if I tried! The second thing is, I didn't know bosses actually told you that you are doing a good job when you are! This is something I have never had before it is so awesome, some days I want to record them saying nice things about me so I can replay it later on when I am at home! Crazy I know!

I know I will not stay at this job forever, it was really just a way to get me back in the swing of working again and to give me time to figure out what I want to do now! But when ever I start thinking about what I might do next I get very sad to think that I might not work with these people anymore!

I'm sure there about a dozen other reason I love this new job so much, but I didn't want to gush to much! And see I told you I was going to try and do better! I'm on a roll now...two post in two days! Now if I could manage to get some new pictures up! And you don't know how excited I was when I got home this afternoon and saw that I actually had comments! It made my day!!!

Is May realy half over?

I keep meaning to blog, but it just hasn't happened! Every time I sit down to do it I just get overwhelmed and quit! The problem is so much has happened and so much is still going on I just can't find a place to begin.

I love my Job, Kevin is changing Jobs but staying with the same organization, I'm not pregnant, Mothers Day was interesting (but not horrible) and My dad is sick. I think I am going to start with my Dad and maybe go from there, but I have a feeling I will be lucky if I actually get this up tonight!

My Dad has cancer, it is stage three and has spread to his lyphnodes and kidneys. He, in my opinion, is doing amazingly well. Some days I have to ask myself if it is actually him. He started chemo last week and like everything else, so far, has taken it in stride and has not let it stop him. He did take a leave of absence from work but that is more or less due to what he dose at work and that they wanted him too.

Most nights I find him sitting on my patio just thinking and relaxing, I don't know if I have seen him this laid back in all my life, but he is and he seams happy. And he is taking it easy on Mom too...which really helps. And even on Mother's Day (when almost know one else did) my Dad leaned over and whispered to me that he was thinking about me and that he missed the girls it made me tear up.

I know that I am a Daddy's girl threw and threw and I have been terrified about what losing my Dad will do to me, but I have decided not to think about it because he is going to get threw this. I truthfully believe that prayer helps and changes things. And let me tell you Dad has an amazing support network of friends and family praying for him and I know that makes all the difference.

I told you I wouldn't get very far (I need a phone I can blog from)...that is all I have time for tonight, I promise I will do my best to get something else off of my list tomorrow. And even if I'm not commenting I am still reading, even if I am behind! But I am thinking about all of you! I promise to get back into the swing of things soon!!!

Just a little Hello!

I started my job well over a month ago, I guess...and it is, well, nice! I like getting up and going to work and I like having a job where people don't freak out if something waits until tomorrow! But we will see if that keeps up! But so far so good!

The one bad thing about the job is that it has sent my heart and brain in to over drive....I know what I want and I know it just isn't the right time yet! But it hasn't stopped me from wanting. I guess in the back of my mind I thought a job would be like a magic wand and fix everything instantly! But it hasn't, but it is a start!

The best part of my job, so far, is the people I work with. They are all genuinely nice. And compassionate. A week or so ago I broke down and told my "boss" (and I use the word boss loosely) about TheGirls. I thought I would get threw it with out crying, but her reaction made me lose my composure and I started crying. She was so nice and thoughtful about the situation...it made me feel welcome and not like I use to. I definitely didn't feel like the elephant in the room. The even funny part is that she said to me later that she would never have guessed that something tragic had ever happened to me, that my personality is so warm and friendly that she never would have thought anything like that! And that made me feel good, because I rarely feel like the old me anymore, but maybe the new me is just as good in the right setting!

I have been finding it really hard to find time to blog but I have been able to check in on most of you a few times a week...and I promise I will get back to commenting soon! I just need to get better a prioritizing my time at night, it is a work in progress!

One other thing has been going on lately...and I am afraid I need to ask you all for a favor. My Dad has been having some issues for a few months now. He has seen his Dr and been in the hospital for testing and they could never figure out what was going on. That is until last week, they found a large tumor consuming more than half of his bladder. Yesterday we learned that he has Stage 3 bladder cancer. On one hand I am glad that he finally has a diagnosis but on the other I am terrified. Luckily we live in Houston and we have one of the countries best Cancer facilities! He is set to see the head of the urology department next week. And we are hoping for some good news, because we really haven't been told a whole lot at this point. Please keep us in your thoughts or prayers, I know we can use them.

Happy Shamrock Day!!

Maggie (and Mr.K and I) wish you a happy St. Patricks Day!

She really wanted to eat the camera after I took the first picture!

Well I haven't started my new job yet because of some crazy finger print snafu and the felon! Go figure! Plus on top of it all the woman in HR is being a real pain in the you know what, I think she thinks I really am the felon! And she keeps trying to say that I am going to be paid less than I actually am! Which yesterday made me have a little panic attack! I even started thinking about turning down the job! Yikes!

In other news...
I yelled at my mom, and it made me cry! I'm going to work for a local school district, not as a teacher, and my mom (and the rest of my family) thinks I should get my certification and teach. Granted two years ago I would have done it, no questions asked...but today I don't want too. I don't know if I could spend all day with someone else's children. What if a parent is mean to a child? Or doesn't treat a child right? I honestly don't think I could handle it...so for now, I'm not going to teach. I might decide one day that I want to, and I will do it, but for now, I don't! But when my mom brought it up for the millionth time, I just let her have it. I told her it wasn't fair of her to keep asking me to do something I didn't want to do and did she not understand how it makes me feel to think about teaching and encouraging a strangers child when I want to be doing that with My Girls? For once it made her shut up! It felt good to shut her up but at the same time I finally admitted what I had been thinking for a long time now and that made me cry.

But what yesterday did I help me to see is that I need to stop worrying so much about what people say and think about me and just be me, whoever that is now. Because I have spent way to much time and energy avoiding telling so many people how I really feel, and I don't want to do it anymore! It is exhausting!

Some days I want to go back to the fun loving, outgoing, creative, shopaholic that I used to be. Some days I see glimpses of her and I realize how much I miss her. I wonder if my friends and family miss her too...

Small Bird Studio Giveaway!!!

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Go check it out! And enter for a chance to win a makeover...a BLOG MAKEOVER!

PS- Real post coming soon!

Super Exciting News!

I know I have been MIA, I'm sorry! I didn't mean to be...it just happened!

My little part-time job has been to much to handle lately....actually it has been a burden and I hate it! I have been so over run that when I get home at night all I want to do is eat dinner and go to bed, which I have several times in the past few weeks!

And strangely enough when I get over run and stressed out I tend to get depressed, so then I cry and feel down in the dumps and (I hate to admit it this) I have a pity party! Which is a lot of the reason I have not written and have only been occasionally checking in!

But today all of that is going to change!

I QUIT my part-time job!

Because...I got a low stress, full time, with benefits J!O!B!

(Insert a picture of me jumping up and down here!)

I almost immediately quit my little part-time job, well I gave my notice any way. And as much as I wanted to say some very choice things to my boss I didn't! I was polite and even told her I would call if for some reason this new job doesn't work out! Which if I am perfectly honest, I will never do!

Can I tell you how excited I am? It has been a long LONG time since I have been this excited! And just a few hours ago I was sitting here on the verge of tears reading an adorable baby shower invite. Wishing and Hoping that it was for me and not a friend!

But tonight I get to cross one thing off my must do before trying again list! And I can live with that!

Good Bye, Depression!

Hello, New Job and Positive Outlook!